Posts Tagged ‘Toddlers and Tiaras Finale’

Toddlers & Tiaras Flashback: Whaaat?! Oh No They Din’t Just Do That! A Few More Outrageously OMG Moments.

Saturday, November 16th, 2013


Not gonna lie.

I’m still having a little trouble reconciling myself to the fact that Toddlers & Tiaras may be gone for good.  I can tell this is gonna be a long process.

I’m missing my guilty pleasure giggles and flabbergasted forehead slaps.  Not to mention all the Life Lessons learned each week.

I’m talking about those classic T&T Moments.  The ones that made us spit our drinks out and then hit Rewind on the remote.  The ones worthy of the TLC Time Capsule. 

Classic.  And outrageous.  And there were lots of them.  Especially the outrageous ones.

The ones that made us laugh more than they should have…and taught us more than we ever needed to know.

Like my girl Paisley, who showed all the Haters how to turn a yellow Muppet Show wig and a couple of wobbly runway struts into mini superstardom.

Umm.  Hello?  Drama Queen on E! anyone?  Or movies?  Or photo shoots and airline peanuts on cross country trips to Hollywood?  Because that’s totally happening, bitches.

Or Mia-donna, who taught me how a true diva should always enter a coat check room at the club.  Running with scissors is so over rated.  Try these bad boys.

26770282kLdAnd don’t forget Makenzie and her keen eye for fashion.

anigif_enhanced-buzz-25856-1326297775-1And Kayla.  Who…well…you know.  Suck it, Miley.

vodka-n-wiskySo TLC, you bring back my show.  Now.  You wouldn’t like me when I don’t get my way.

tumblr_m1zp2hfiWt1qfk1qeo1_500I’m kind of a big deal in the Toddler Blogosphere, mmmkay?  Just sayin’.

tumblr_lq02ous3rb1qbnfoaSo bring it back and I promise I’ll be happy.

tumblr_lq02vv0jOM1qbnfoaHappy.  And pretty fabulous.


Toddlers & Tiaras Flashback: Pass The Pixie Stix, Please. It’s Another Look Back At Classic Glitter Girl Moments.

Friday, November 8th, 2013


Oh.  Hell.  No.

This just ain’t right.

Still banging your head against the wall because Toddlers & Tiaras has gone away?

Having trouble detoxing after six seasons of sugar buzzing?  Missing the sweet taste of Tinker Tea on your tongue and the residue of tanning overspray on your kitchen table?

Well, you’re not alone.  Seems like a lot of people are having trouble dealing with TLC’s sudden decision to shut off our pageant crack pipeline.  Coming down’s the hardest part.

And I hate to see anyone suffer, so I’ll take another one for the team and rewind a few more classic Glitter Girls Gone Wild moments to help everyone deal with the loss.

Because I feel your pain.

26770285eBtYou can never go wrong with money and snacks.  Right, Paisley?


Any outfit looks better with attitude and a Ni-Ni.  Right, Makenzie?


‘B’ is for Boy.  ‘D ‘is for Diva.  Put ’em together and you just spelled Brock.


Seriously.  After that one, I got nuthin’.


Bitch, I’m out.


Toddlers & Tiaras Flashback: R.I.P.? Is Your Guilty Pleasure Gone Too Soon Or Coming Back To Sparkle Again?

Saturday, October 26th, 2013


Uh oh.

You might want to unplug those hot rollers and get that spray tan machine off the kitchen table, people.  Maybe even try to start coming down from the pixie stix high you’ve been trippin’ on for six seasons, because it’s not looking good for everyone’s favorite unspoken guilty pleasure.

Everyone is talking about it, but nobody knows what’s going on.  

Kinda like the “Who Shot JR?” of 2013.  But not really.

Toddlers & Tiaras is MIA.  And no one at TLC or the Ramada front desk is talking.

The show that made finger kissing cool again has been cancelled.  Or maybe not.

But probably.

No one is saying.  And I’m not liking it.  I even had to read a book on Wednesday night.

Well, ok.  I bought one anyway.  And I may even read it someday after I work through my Toddler withdrawals.  We’ll see.  Baby steps.

Little tiny pretty feet baby steps.

But for now, take strength in knowing that I would never leave you hanging cold turkey.

If the sparkle has really gone out of our Wednesday nights, the least I can do is toss you a bone or two while we figure out how to reprogram our DVRs.

So jump in the Toddler Time Machine with me and bloop back to some of our favorite moments.  The ones that would have made amazing water cooler conversations on Thursday morning if anyone else in the office actually admitted to watching the show.

Like Makenzie Myers.  The Ultimate Grand Supreme Meltdown Queen.  ReMixed.

[field name=iframe]

Or the Ultimate Grand Supreme Breakout Star of the entire half dozen seasons.

Honey Boo Boo Child.

Tanked up on sass and Go-Go Juice, Alana Thompson holla’d her way to a dolla and into our hearts as soon as she hit the screen.  Accompanied by her substantially beautimous Mama June and a house full of Brawny paper towels, they got all up in our faces so fast we didn’t have any choice but to redneckognize their awesomeness.

They loved pageants and roadkill and gave us a whole new type of Krazy.

Honey Boo Boo Style.

[field name=iframe2]

Hopefully these cheap seat repeats will bring back a few fond memories.  Maybe even some of the memories that you thought were finally suppressed.  Who knows.

And if you’ve never had the pleasure…it’s all new to you, right?  You have no idea I’m just spitting out old stuff and then going to bed.

As we try and work through our separation anxiety issues, I think it’s important to remember all the baby breakdowns and mama meltdowns that made us smile and scratch our heads and almost choke on our ill-fitting flippers over the years.

So enjoy.

And Sparkle, Baby.

At least a few more times, anyway.


%d bloggers like this: