Posts Tagged ‘Toddlers & Tiaras’

Dance Moms Rewind: A Survival Guide Of Life Lessons Learned At The ALDC. Some Old Stuff…Until The New Stuff.

Saturday, June 14th, 2014

Cut me some slack, people.  It’s better than nothing.

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Not gonna lie.  This whole Dance Moms dry spell kinda caught me off guard.

Wait.  What?  No new episodes?  At first I was all like…

giphy-1Then I think I went into denial or something.
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Until I finally just lost my nutty.  Oh  Hell Nah.

ep17_-_holly_1Luckily, someone let me know it’s only temporary and the show would be back.

tumblr_m5c17dxjfa1r43mqxo1_500I tried filling the lonely hours with my other hobby.

Tumblr_lrhm9mOLYu1qgpj81o2_500That was fun for a few weeks, but eventually I got bored.  And pretty bloated.

tumblr_mr4cmpl8nx1r2gixro1_500It was time to stop being such a baby and remember what the ALDC taught us:

toddlers-tiaras-its-time-to-pop-in-your-pappy-L-p_Y69xWalk into work on Monday like a Boss, even when you’re still wearing Friday’s clothes.

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Or make this fiercely fabulous entrance.  PS…This bitch is totally copying Nia.

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Portion control.  Just do it, fercryinoutloud.

Kelly-Stop-Eating-Dance-MomsAwkwardly inappropriate office bromances seem to be more accepted nowadays.

Lifetime_Dance-Moms_0_Boy-Crazy-Mom-Crazy_110864_LF_HD_768x432-16x9Never underestimate the power of a sassy new makeover, mmmkay?

tumblr_inline_mqyz06xPq31qz4rgpI know, right?  So beautiful.  My principal never had zippers on her pant suits.

tumblr_m9fpxdDEXy1r7dslfHow the Laverne & Shirley of our generation made subtlety and noon cocktails a thing.

dance-moms-quotes-christi-116-1And don’t even get me started on Walmart.

Leslie_payton_dsdsI know what you guys are probably thinking by now…

tumblr_lyovjwWxmn1ql5yr7o1_400Of course not.  I mean…well, maybe just a little.

tumblr_m7c3qznboJ1ql5yr7o1_400But I have an amazing poker face, so you’d never know it.

tumblr_static_sdfkj_kendallAll things considered, I think I’m handling the mid-season break pretty well.

1578086874_1785443392001_Lifetime-Dance-Moms-222-Dr-Holly039s-Book-Club-114522-SFOr not, maybe.

Toddlers-and-Tiaras-CryingYeah.  Emotionally…

Tumblr_mjzyabM4nQ1qd9agqo1_500Totally unrelated side note:  This is still the best gif ever in the history of ever.  Werk.

Tumblr_mijdq2cJNl1ql5yr7o1_500So now I guess we should just sit and stare at the TV until Dance Moms returns.

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Sounds like a plan.  You know where to find me.  Buh Bye now.

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Here Comes Honey Boo Boo Rewind: Celebrate 2 Billion Gangnam Style Hits With The Redneck Mashed-Up Classic.

Sunday, June 1st, 2014

booboostyle

Trust me.

Dolla still make me holla.

But 2 billion youtube hits?  That’s Redneckulous.

That’s right.  Park Jae-sangPSY to all us hipsters…and his Gangnam Style dance anthem just crossed the 2 billion views mark.

You heard me.  Billion.  With a ‘B.  Like in ‘Boo Boo.’

Apparently, almost two years later everybody is still doing it Gangnam Style.

So what better excuse to bring back one of the best music video mash-ups evah for your viewing pleasure to celebrate the milestone.

The official Honey Boo Boo Style ReMix.

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You know I still love me some Toddlers & Tiaras.

I miss all that sparkly goodness more every day.  And I’m always up for anything that will help my milkshake bring all the boys to the yard, so to speak.

So naturally, adding some Go-Go Juice to my Gangnam seemed like the next logical step.

Cuz that s*** makes everything even better.

To congratulate Psy, let’s all enjoy another look at Honey Boo Boo Child going Gangnam in the ultimate Korean Redneck ReMix.

It’s like someone took everything inside my brain and made a music video.  Some of my favorite obsessions brilliantly mixed together until they’re smooth as buttah and ketchup.

And, surprisingly, even more tasty the second time they’re served.

It’s like Korean Sketti.  That you can dance to.

And you’re welcome.

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Oppa Gangnam Style.

Y’all.

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Toddlers & Tiaras: They’re Baaaaack! It’s Paisley Vs. Isabella In The Return To Glitterdome. Everything You Love Is Back. Stock Up On The Cheese Dip!

Saturday, March 24th, 2012

You might as well make things easier on yourself and start planning now.

And by planning, I mean creating a backstory for when you call in sick to work on Thursday, April 5th…because the Mother of all Guilty Pleasures is about to Glitter Bomb you in the face again.

Toddlers & Tiaras is baaaaack!

Well, almost.

Wednesday, April 4th, actually.  Just a few more weeks and then the show that you pretend you never watch and never talk about is pretty feeting its way back into your living room with a vengeance.

It’s going to be the Battle of the New Mini Divas as Paisley and Isabella face off after months of media smack talk and underage nightclub singing.

Paisley, best known for rocketing to fame by way of her now infamously uncomfortable Julia Roberts Pretty Woman hooker outfit, is hoping to have another cheese dip celebration with a shiny new crown on her head.

Isabella, best known for both talking s*** about Paisley to TMZ when they caught her over the holidays all freshly spray tanned (…and questionably/allegedly coached by Mom…) and skyrocketing to LMAFO “Sexy And I Know It” karaoke fame with an infamously uncomfortable video performance, is hoping to talk more s*** and score a big crown at the same time.

It’s Dramalicious.  And that’s only the kids.

Don’t get me started on the Moms.  Let’s just say you do NOT want to be caught in the same Walmart parking lot when those two Moms go shopping.  Ever.

MakenzieAlana and the rest better watch their backs.  There are some new and returning faces looking to knock those oversized crowns off their heads.

No wonder Eden jumped ship to LOGO.

Trust me, Honey Boo-Boo Child…this is gonna get good.

High Five if you’ll be there.

And…why, yes…I am.  And I know it.

Thanks for asking.


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